I'M The Star Of THIS Movie, Bub!
I've always figured that if I worked really hard at my musical craft and wrote and recorded enough songs that I thought were really good that one day I would be rewarded with critical acclaim and some measure of commercial success. By the same token, I figured that if I put together a good band with exciting players aiding and abetting me, that more and more people would eventually become fans of that band and help propel it to (again) critical acclaim and some measure of commercial success.
That's the stuff of my illogical fantasy world that only exists in my brain.
The mathematical brass tacks of this universe say this: Each of us is simply the chosen star of our own largely fictitious movie. We delude ourselves into believing we are Luke Skywalker and that we will prevail against all odds and win acclaim and adulation for our heroic actions. We certainly cannot be one of the hapless citizens of the doomed planet Alderaan...can we?
Granted, I might be one of the luckiest human beings to ever walk the face of the earth simply because I was somehow granted the opportunity to be born into a relatively cushy life in the most affluent, powerful civilization in the long annals of human existence. (Probably around 99% of the people who have ever lived never had the chance to even enjoy the luxury of electricity, let alone access to safe drinking water and a conveniently located Walmart.)
But living in 2015 America changes nothing about the math of human (and specifically my) experience.
The subjectivity of my perceptions withers in the face of statistical reality. The universe doesn't revolve around me any more than it does around you. Being the wishful star of my own movie means only that I am the wishful star of my own movie.
Granted, working harder than everyone else (not to imply I have actually ever done that!) at something certainly can improve the odds that you or I will enjoy some measure of success in reaching our goals, whatever they might be. It would be foolish to assert otherwise. Nonetheless, the odds are not in my favor. Nor are they in yours. My life and my music are two little tiny (more microscopic than microscopic) threads in the fabric of the cosmos's past, present, and future.
That said, I say, SO WHAT! I am, after all, the star of my own movie. And in my movie, lots of people over the course of my life discover and come to like, or even love, Book Of Kills music. I hope that I am, or one day become, more than a bit player in your movie! And if I do...thanks! Thanks very very much. I will do my best to make your movie a little more interesting and fun.
And in the meantime, please excuse me...I have a movie to star in.